I’m in a weird state of mind as of late. Perhaps it’s the heat. I still don’t have air conditioning. I haven’t had air conditioning in ten years. Living on the 8th floor in a box of heat isn’t the best for sanity.
I’m in a little bit of a panic because I’ve come to realize there is SO MUCH I need to do before I die or am forever crippled into bed and unable to do anything. I can admit that I’m not totally at zero on my to-do list but sometimes that is hard to remember because I forgot to write the to-do list.
What happened to all of us over the years that made us believe it’s in our best interest to spend the large majority of our time doing mundane tasks in order to be able to eat, sleep, and see a doctor? What are we really doing this for? I’m wasting way too much of my life so that I can organize a far more interesting life for a family that manipulates people for financial gain. This doesn’t make me happy. Making myself an enlightened, ethical, and socially responsible human should be my priority. That’s what I should spend my time doing.
I have to figure out a way to make this happen. I need to have a life where I can travel, learn, and do something societally beneficial. I know, I know, I dream big. Then again, if you aren’t dreaming big, what’s the point of dreaming?