Tuesday, January 26, 2010

A Bottle of Wine and Biding My Time

I've got nothing going on. I'm sitting here in my apartment after spending the day cleaning and doing laundry. I'm applying for jobs but have not really seen anything that seemed fitting or appropriate for my skill set. It worries me.

I opened a bottle of wine that my mother sent me. It's Educated Guess which is a Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa Valley. It's delicious (Thanks Mom!). I should really walk over to the cubbord and get a wine glass. I have some gorgeous red wine glasses that I adore (Thanks Case) and an AMAZING wine opener that makes uncorking a bottle as easy as removing a beer cap. (Thanks BabaHot).

I've been spending the last week reconnecting with friends that I haven't had the time to see as much over the last six months or so. I think seeing them is the only thing keeping me sane. I spent last night singing in a private karaoke room with two friends (Thanks Ava and Dana.) It's my friend Chad's birthday today and somehow I got him to share his homemade dinner with me the other day (Thanks Chad and Jess!)

Today I signed up for Skype. Want to friend me? I'm not giving out my name to just anybody but I dig this thing. It's a cool little invention. I especially like that you can do a free group chat. I think it helps build friendships. I'm not the best at keeping in communication with people so hopefully this will be another way to keep me at it.

I'm so sorry to post such a pathetic, mindless, .... whatever the f*** this is. In all honesty I've been an emotional whack job the last couple days. No idea why. I keep saying it out loud so I won't get too caught up in it and don't take anything too seriously. Honestly the one thing that really seemed to help and lift spirits was taking a Bikram class. I'm going to try and keep at that for awhile and see if it continues to help. Hell, it's a lot cheaper than therapy!

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Scary Dreams

Do you ever have dreams that are so vivid you actually have to go back over what you did the day before just to make sure they didn't happen? I do. I had a dream like that last night and for a good minute I was really scared today until I remembered I didn't leave my home at all last night. The scariest part is that what happened in my dream could easily happen any time if I let my guard down.

In dream land I was at a bar I frequent where I know the bartender. I was with some old friends and some new friends that I don't know as well. I was towards the end of my first beer when I noticed I was feeling funny. Infact I was feeling intoxicated. It hit me all at once. I remember saying to the bartender that something was wrong and I think I had been drugged. I wanted him to please make sure I didn't leave with anyone and help me get a cab. Then everyone there was trying to escort me back to my apartment to make sure I was safe but I had to do it alone because I still had no idea who drugged me in the first place. Who was I supposed to be afraid of? Everyone? I don't even remember if I made it home in my dream. It just sort of fades out and I assume I must have had to wake up at this point.

I guess I probably had this dream because it is something I am constantly aware of. I feel like it's something I'm supposed to be prepared for just incase. My best friend was drugged once when she was alone at a bar with a bartender she knew. She had to keep a stranger from following her home and spent the night lying on the floor of her hallway in her own vomit. I've known several women who have had things like this happen to them. It really is a nightmare.

As for all of you I wish you only sweet dreams.