Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Beauty Secrets From Yours Truly

Through my complete lack of researching I have finally found the answer to looking young and beautiful. Did you know that you are just a few blended pig placentas away from the youthful skin you remember or hope to preserve? It even comes in a bottle! That's right friends. I'm cutting out carbs and throwing in a delicious placenta because, hey, animals do it! Animals also eat the intestines out of not quite dead yet creatures and you know, maybe they are on to something there as well. I've always wondered about the Placenta brand shampoo that came in jugs from CVS. I didn't understand why it was a good choice as a hair product but now I understand. You are supposed to drink it! The obvious answers are always right there in front of us and yet we never see. No, we never see.


GMEyster said...

I agree with the comment from someone who said: 'I would rather die looking old and ugly.'

Seriously. There is far too much in this culture based on looks and youth. What's WRONG with getting older? I am earning my wrinkles proudly. I think it's about taking care of yourself, the best way you can.

No placenta for me, thanks! Eek!

Macoosh said...

ew. a lot of women these days are eating the placenta after giving birth because it's proven to cure post pardem depression. i'm sure it works b/c you'd spend the time being grossed out at yourself instead of depressed.

it is truly gross.

people even bring them home and fry it. i'm not kidding.

Carly said...

I wonder if it tastes like eggs.

JasonBSchmidt said...

Mmm eggs.