A Bottle of Wine and Biding My Time

I've got nothing going on. I'm sitting here in my apartment after spending the day cleaning and doing laundry. I'm applying for jobs but have not really seen anything that seemed fitting or appropriate for my skill set. It worries me.

I opened a bottle of wine that my mother sent me. It's Educated Guess which is a Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa Valley. It's delicious (Thanks Mom!). I should really walk over to the cubbord and get a wine glass. I have some gorgeous red wine glasses that I adore (Thanks Case) and an AMAZING wine opener that makes uncorking a bottle as easy as removing a beer cap. (Thanks BabaHot).

I've been spending the last week reconnecting with friends that I haven't had the time to see as much over the last six months or so. I think seeing them is the only thing keeping me sane. I spent last night singing in a private karaoke room with two friends (Thanks Ava and Dana.) It's my friend Chad's birthday today and somehow I got him to share his homemade dinner with me the other day (Thanks Chad and Jess!)

Today I signed up for Skype. Want to friend me? I'm not giving out my name to just anybody but I dig this thing. It's a cool little invention. I especially like that you can do a free group chat. I think it helps build friendships. I'm not the best at keeping in communication with people so hopefully this will be another way to keep me at it.

I'm so sorry to post such a pathetic, mindless, .... whatever the f*** this is. In all honesty I've been an emotional whack job the last couple days. No idea why. I keep saying it out loud so I won't get too caught up in it and don't take anything too seriously. Honestly the one thing that really seemed to help and lift spirits was taking a Bikram class. I'm going to try and keep at that for awhile and see if it continues to help. Hell, it's a lot cheaper than therapy!

Mixed Emotions

I believe that every action every living being makes in their lifetime affects the entire universe in some way. How could it not? Everything you do that causes energy including each movement, word, thought, causes a reaction of some sort in the universe. When you think about it at length we have all created each other and everything around us throughout evolution. The earth took a part. The galaxy took a part. Everything took a part of something. We are all connected. It's such a beautiful realization and yet, so obvious. At the same time it is terrifying. In the midst of this beautiful thought I remember I'm connected and a part of everyone and thing that disgusts me as well. If every positive thought has a reaction then so must every negative thought. Both must be necessary for some reason. As disappointing as that seems, it gives me hope. It gives us control. How do you get on the path to enlightenment? How can we overcome the fear and ignorance that holds us back from a potential not even imaginable at our current brain capacity? In the end are the things we fight for worth it? Whose battle is it really? Now I'm all over the place, I know. New found hope always fills me with endless questions that in the end just cause mixed emotions.