Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Is your heart broken?
I’m not talking about your damn feelings. I want to know if you have had your ticker checked recently. Chest pain? Palpitations? Get to the f’ing doctor! Especially since you cosmically know me in some way. I’m starting to feel like the beacon of all heart pain and I mean that in addition to your damn feelings. I’m sure you all know people with these problems but come on, I’m in my twenties. This is ridiculous. Within the past week I’ve had two friends in the emergency room with heart issues. They are both way too young for that to be even close to normal. Neither of them are drug users so you can cross that right off your list of excuses. My mom was just telling me the other day that my crazy uncle called her in the middle of the night saying he thought he was having a heart attack but didn’t want to call an ambulance. What the hell? Call the damn ambulance! You live across the country. What in the hell is your sister going to do to help you? CPR doesn’t work over the phone. On the upside of this everybody has been fine. Just make sure you go to the doctor. I’m a little afraid that every time I start having an anxiety attack and my heart is beating out of my chest I’m going to convince myself I’m having a heart attack. Like I needed one more thing on my list of crazy. Thanks a lot universe.