Delurkify

It's national Delurking Day in blog land. If by chance there is anyone reading this today is the day to leave a comment and make yourself known! Anyone? Bueller?
*Credit to Rude Cactus for creation of Delurking Day.

Last Thursday night I went to a hypnotism show. Casey decided to participate and did many an amusing thing including playing butt guitar and making love to a chair that he was calling a chicken. He remembers everything and felt more like he was playing along rather than doing things unintentionally. Yeah, I'm glad I stayed in the audience. It was hilarious.

Spamalot (The Monty Python Musical) had it's final show on Broadway last night. I went in 2005 while the show was still in previews with the original cast and then again last night. It was really exciting to see the final show with Eric Idle coming up on stage after the curtain call and giving a speach thanking everyone. He asked all people in the audience that had been a part of the show at any point to come up. David Hyde Pierce was there and looking, well, sort of pale and scary. It was a great experience. I've never been at the closing night of a Broadway show. It's bitter sweet.

Did any lurkers show up yet? Reveal yourselves!

You don't make heroes out of Warlocks!

Wow. I laughed. I cringed. I got a little nauseous.



I wish I could go to camp.

Rock Band

Dear Rock Band,

I hate you. Sure you provide endless entertainment for video game nerds around the world but shouldn't they be outside getting some sun on their pasty faces or God forbid, learning to play REAL instruments? Sure you are an amusing game. Lights and images all a flutter with cool tunes blasting. Even I enjoy looking for the first half hour and then the motion sickness comes. I have to look away or I will hurl on your cheap guitar with the colorful buttons designed to simplify the ever so complicated concept of strings.

I have to admit, for a little while I enjoy playing or singing along. Then I get angry. I get angry because you are a computer game and you are ruining the music for me. Not only do you force our pretend band that is intensely staring at a tv screen to play note for note second for second EXACTLY what you tell us to but you also make it so that the music is being overpowered by loud clicking of plastic buttons and drum beats. All the clicking makes my head spin. It seriously spins like a poltergeist took over. That is what you do to me Rock Band. That is exactly what you do.

Everybody else just loves you. "Aren't you fun! What a great game you are!" I know what you are trying to do. You are trying to take over the world. You are trying and damnit you are winning you bastard. Nobody seems to see it but me. The novelty of pretending to be a rock star doesn't wear off...it intensifies. They grow addicted to you. Suddenly you are the only thing anybody wants to do. Oh, your followers may think I'm exaggerating but I'm on to you. I'll let them play but I'll be watching. I'll be watching with a set of garden sheers on your power cord. If I see even the slightest hint of my friends turning into zombies, you will die. I will beat you to death with your own bass driven right through your drum set. Screw you Rock Band!

Kiss Off,

Knight

What Brings You here?

Some of my favorite search terms bringing people to my blog:
"hugs~fear of"
McIncest
How much do morticians make?
I luvs my gun.

That sums up my entire blog rather nicely I think.

So, how about the game last night, eh? I thought it was pretty boring for awhile. That last quarter though, wow. I'm not really the get out of your seat screaming type but I was clapping on the inside. Since my profession/thing I do to pay bills is in the ad industry I can't help but intently watch all the commercials during the game. For some reason I felt like a few of the ads were targeting me. It started with the fed ex pigeon thing


Anybody that knows me is aware of my fear of birds. I don't eat them. I don't think they are cute pets. They creep me out.
Of course since it's the Super Bowl, some wings are being prepared from the pale, slimy, skin basics in the kitchen. Alright that's fine. I can handle that. I'm usually totally fine around people eating wings. It's been awhile since I've seen a large group of people pounce on a plate of sauce covered birds and rip the skin off the bone. Most of you are probably drooling. I was trying not to think about the uncooked version I just avoided in the kitchen. I have not felt like that in awhile. I didn't even know it still had that effect on me. Of course soon after this scene the pigeon ad comes up. Nice, thanks Fed Ex. My fault. I know better during super bowl parties.

Then, as I'm thinking a little too much about which spots my clients are going to ask for at work the next day, I catch myself.. why the hell do I freakin' care about this?
Que Career builders:

Damn, I wish my heart would do that!

After that a baby puked on itself and bought a clown.

I'm not sure what that means yet but I'll figure it out. I did wake up today mumbling "must invest at e*trade. must kidnap Bozo" Ah, the art of Brainwashing.

Cruise for Prez! Chant with me now...

I wanted to post this yesterday but just didn't find the time. If you didn't hear yet, video of Tom Cruise talking about his wacky adventures in Scientology is posted on Gawker and they say they are not taking it down. Obviously this video traveled through the web fast but it has quickly been forced off of shared video sites like google video and youtube. (Supposedly because of the Church of Scientology copyright infringement notice.)
Personally, I enjoy watching it. He says some craaaazy shiznet. "Have you met an SP? *WILD CACKLE*" "Wow,SP's, we'll just read about those in the history books!"
Man, I wish I could go on vacation too.. but I can't. Because, I know. Tom knows. Don't you Tom?

To be honest I might be overexposed to odd people because I didn't think this video was all that strange. He sounds like a religious politician to me. Let's put him on the ballot.

Anybody need a calendar?

Now that the holidays are over I find myself getting all the gifts in order and locating their proper place in my apartment. Okay, yes, I should have done this weeks ago. Nevertheless, I have just one thing left that is of no use to me. I appreciate the thought grandma but I really have no idea where to put a desk calender. Some of you might say, "Why not take it to work?" Well, No. You see, this specific calendar is "The Secret" themed and I fear if I read this self affirmation crap every day I might go crazy.

The first day reads something along the lines of:
Think happy thoughts every night before you go to bed and when you wake up every morning. Be thankful for your day whether it was good or bad. Eventually you will see improvement.

Eventually I will become a zombie that talks to myself and whistles constantly. I've got a secret for you.. this isn't a freakin' secret. Why do people always fall for that? Yes, having a positive attitude and gaining confidence improves your life or at least your outlook on it. Thanks for the $30 enjoy the DVD. Don't forget to buy the book!

A New Hobby

I have a new interest and his name is Derren Brown. He calls himself a Mentalist, Hypnotist, and magician. I somehow ran across a mention of him in the comments on some random blog. The comment amused me so I youtubed the name and came across many clips from his UK show Trick of the Mind. Here is one of my favorites.



I chose to post this specific clip because I feel it somewhat goes along with my blog.

This Derren fellow seems to be very charming. I enjoy watching him and have great interest in the things he has studied. I'm not really a fan of magic but I would like to know more about the human mind and how things like hypnotism work. Maybe I see it as a vulnerability in myself and I would like to have a greater knowledge to protect myself. Maybe I just like odd things. What's your take on this whole thing?

You'll Eat Your Kids

Introducing the musical stylings of Westboro Baptist Church




If you are not familiar with this church/cult you can find tons of information about them on you tube and google search. I think it's terrifying how easily people are brain washed. This church/cult has less then 100 members and 80% of them are related. They keep breeding and brainwashing their children to think just like them. So scary but at the same time... kind of hilarious. I thought this video was pretty damn funny. Who wrote these lyrics? How did they decide which person gets the solo?

Well anyway, they were recently sued for "protesting" at a soldiers funeral. (They believe American soldiers deaths are punishment for our nations tolerance of homosexuality.) They have been ordered to pay 11 million in compensation.

Religious extremists always blow my mind. What on earth could they be thinking? Can they possibly be that ignorant? Does it ever occur to them to question themselves? If only there was a way to help them. I'm pretty sure hatred is taught not genetically inherited so there has to be some hope but how do you teach people that they are capable of free thought?

I want to study to be a hypnotist. Maybe that can give me answers. Anyone want to join me?

Brainwashing

I've become obsessed with this site and reading all the links. Maybe I'll learn some techniques. Mwah ha ha!


You have all begun your journey into Cult Carly. Please remove your shoes and pants at the door.